Heavy hearted.

That's what I'm feeling right now. There's a lot of things running through my head that keeps me busy and forces me to focus on them. I don't like it, cause I know where it leads me to.

I'm still really bothered by a lot of things, but my reaction has been different. Mostly because I know that things are changing. And it doesn't matter how hard I try to keep things the same, because I can't do anything about it.

My realizations make my chest feel like there's something pressing down on it. It hurts, but then a few seconds later, it's gone. It hurts to know that things are going in the direction that they are. I guess that's just a part of life: change.

Since I was younger, I've had my life change almost every 2 years. Irvine is the longest area I've stayed in. I didn't want it to change. It has. The things that use to be familiar are no longer the way I remember. People have changed. Locations have changed. Roles have changed.

I'm still really bitter. And you have no idea. It hurts to know you feel that way.